Mar 172005

7:30 AM: The alarm clock is ringing. Welcome to another promising day in your life. Get up, man, the world is waiting for your input and brilliant ideas!

8:01 AM: After having the first cigarette, checking mail and visiting the usual suspects on the net I end up in the bathroom. Brushing teeth in the shower, hair drying while hoping for the Axe-effect to finally work today. One last look into the mirror… well… spare that.

8:33 AM: Firing up my motorbike… oh lord.. she almost sounds like a big one meanwhile. Guess I should have the exhaust pipe fixed sometime soon, before the police stops me.

9:05 AM: Shit, 5 minutes late again, and that bloody elevator takes another 5 minutes to appear. Imagine… this is a 25 floor building… its got 4 – in letters: FOUR – elevators, and whenever you call that damn thing, it takes up to 10 minutes for one to appear. Until then about 2.463 people are gathering in front of the door and you feel as if you won in the lottery, when you manage to get into the cabin… and what for? To reach your working place! Hah!

9:12 AM: Opening the door to the place I’m meant to spent my day in, trying to throw a friendly “Hi” into the room, 9 tired faces rising, creating noises like a squad of sea lions in mating season. I guess, uhm.. I hope they tried to wish a Good morning to me. Strolling over to my seat at the far end of the one big table all other people are already sitting at. And then… the first and probably the most important decision of the day: Will I have a cigarette first or will I get me a cup of tea? I decide for a cup of tea and taking that with me to the smoking area in the abandoned staircase. About 10 other people already there… normally you wouldn’t need to light a cigarette anymore, just taking a deep breath would be enough… but, well, I feel good being criminalized, so I light one as well… just out of solidarity.

How to waste your life away

9:32 AM Back at my table. Okay, lets start the working day. Picking up my book, reading R.J.’s WOT again, I’m leaning back. And then it begins again! Someone… always the same someone, starts philosophizing about just anything, the weather, unemployment, a meteor threatening the city, soccer, the latest movie on TV last night, about renovating his place, the coughing of his cat, his wife, who left him after 23 years of marriage (and she’s got all my respect for that decision and all my pity for taking so long to make it). I’m trying to concentrate on my book, which is quite hard when you feel the need to pull the gun and shoot everyone who dares to say a single word more.

10:00 AM, 11:00 AM, 12:00 AM: Break… cigarette break… putting down my book and trying to leave the room without attracting attention, which is virtually impossible, if a moving fly on the wall is the major event of the morning. I never succeed in leaving the room alone, there is always someone following. Not a single minute without anyone chewing your ears… sigh… do I really have to lock myself up in the toilet to be alone?

12:15 AM: Lunch break! YIPPHHIIIEEE… Everybody’s leaving for the close by canteen. No, I wont join you today, exactly like I did not join you yesterday or the day before or the day before that day. Thank you, creator of the universe, for the 30 minutes of silence. But its just too short anyway…

12:45 AM: The door opens and the horde is swapping in again. Oh, they got new topics to talk about: unemployment, weather, TV, soccer…. AAAAARRRGHHHHHH…………. SHUT THE FUCK UP!

01:00 PM, 02:00 PM, 02:50 PM: No, I didn’t succeed in leaving the room alone, not today, not yesterday, and I probably never will. But very soon I will shoot someone, may be myself, just to be rid of this. I like reading, yes, I do, but going somewhere just to read a book while a bunch of people is falling in love with hearing their own voices, I’m going nuts.

03:00.00,00 PM: I’m leaving the room for good, with my helmet in my hand and as the first one, Again waiting for the elevator for a ridiculously long time, sprinting passed the guy at the entrance desk, jumping my bike and riding home with smoking wheels. What a great day… I did read another 120 pages in my book today and I didn’t kill anyone… yes, it was a good day.


This is how your day looks like as a victim of “HartzIV”, Germany’s answer to Death Penalty. This is how your day looks like, when you are forced to take a 1-Euro-job, which doesn’t really exist, but is created only virtually to beautify the statistics. There is no job, there is nothing to do, just to get up in the morning, spend some hours there and go home again. At least you don’t count towards the army of unemployed people anymore. If that is how social security is meant to work in future, this design of society and form of government wont survive much longer, because at some point people WILL finally stand up and fight for their rights, their right to survive. But it takes a lot for Germans to stand up, we rather sit and lament about it… see!

But there’s one thing I learned so far: you’ll never know how many topics there are that you cant relate to until you’ve heard them all… and it seems it’ll never stop.

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